LISTEN!
| When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving advice, you have not done what I asked. When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way, you are trampling on my feelings. When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem, you have failed me, strange as that may seem. Listen! All I asked was that you listen. Not talk or DO - just hear me. Advice is cheap - you can Google answers to countless questions. And I can do for myself, I am not helpless. Maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless. When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself, you contribute to my fear and weakness. But when you accept as a simple fact that I do feel what I feel, No matter how irrational, then I can quit trying to convince you Irrational feelings can make sense when we understand what's behind them.and can get about the business of understanding what's behind this irrational feeling.And when that's clear, the answers are obvious And I don't need advice. So, please listen and just hear me. And, if you want to talk, wait a while for your turn, and I will listen to you! Go well |