Families That Work and Play Together
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The left column lists stages of attachment development: . | On the right are ways of responding to indications of attachment difficulties. |
| Hurtful reactions to a child’s distressed or distressing behaviours
are understandable, not least because the adopters' or foster carers' own
distress is all too easily restimulated by what the child says and does. But
those reactions can reinforce the mistrust, shame, guilt, etc. that underpin
the attachment difficulties, thus creating a loop that it's hard to break out of! | That hurtful
loop can be more complex and more painful when the issue of racial difference
is factored in, especially if the racial dimension is ignored, denied or discounted. |
| Most parents, carers, youth-workers etc., are usually quite good |
|
Child |
Carer |
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Healthy Attachment < > Attachment Difficulties |
Hurtful responses < > Healing responses |
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Erikson |
Mallows |