Crafty Listening
is concerned with The Art and Craft of Listening especially when enhanced with Clean Language Questions.
The site is based on the belief that there is much to be said for developing - by practicing -
the skills and attributes required to be and remain:
- Curious in the face of the familiar
- Responsive when your buttons are being pressed
- Assertive when awash with adrenalin
- Focused in the midst of chaos
- Thoughtful when your mind's in a whirl
- Yes-minded when nothing is going well
Just to be clear, love does not necessarily require that we like or agree with other people.
Love shows itself when your (or my) behaviour registers on other people's consciousness as compassion, respect, attention, flexibility, time to think, generosity of spirit, patience, the benefit of the doubt. It is experienced when we (or other people) are asked questions (with genuine curiosity) before we agree or disagree or start an argument. And it is a felt experience when we sense and hear that someone is, at the very least, seeking first to understand.
As often as not, it is fear that prevents us from listening with love - or what ever else you might prefer to call it!
As you are probably aware, we are capable of picking up on each other's energy, be it positive or negative, and it is better to be aware of what is impacting on or influencing our state. And just as desirable to be conscioualy aware of the effect we are having on others so that we can calibrate in order to influence them - hopefully with integrity.
If we are driven by habit or fear, other people often pick up on our negative energy and their ability to function as intelligent grown-ups can be seriously impaired.
Nervousness, anxiety, frustration, self-doubt, lack of confidence, low emotional intelligence, personality clashes, whatever we call it - when we choose not to treat other people, or ourselves, with the qualities listed above, we will almost certainly think less clearly, feel more reactive or aggressive and function less intelligently.
Anyone willing to learn the craft and develop the art of listening will have a profound effect on other people's ability to think more intelligently and act more rationally.
The workshops and other things on this site designed to increase people's ability and desire to take full responsibility for what each of us contributes to the way we communicate.
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The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its
own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the
mystery of eternity, of life, of the marvellous structure of reality. It is
enough if one merely tries to comprehend a little of this mystery every day.
Never lose a holy curiosity.
Albert
Einstein